Last night I found myself flipping through people's xanga's that I know, but they don't know I have a xanga..nor do I want them to know.  and it's not like I write anything too private on my journal...it's just...I don't know.  I feel like I've lost trust in these people, because of some things that happened...I don't know. 

I do know that I'm sick of being miserable, and sick of wishing I could have things that are impossible for me to have.  I feel like I'm in a rut, and that there's nothing to look forward to, except that there's a ton to look forward to.  gah, I'm sick of it, that's for sure.